Miscarriage: The Heartbreak and the Lies

Judie Brown
August 22, 2014
Reproduced with Permission
American Life League

Moral theologian William Smith once commented that "all social engineering is preceded by verbal engineering." In today's 140-character Twitter world, what this means is that it is not very hard to manipulate language to deceive an unaware public.

This is why the culture defines the act of aborting a baby as an "issue"! Talk about robbing the humanity from a person by the word you use!

One of the most effective verbal engineering experts in our midst today is Planned Parenthood, whose sloganeering is designed to deceive and kill. For example, we recently learned that a York, Pennsylvania, Planned Parenthood defined abortion as a " voluntary miscarriage ." My first reaction, penned in a late-July commentary, stated , "The arrogance of such comments is indicative of what happens when a culture loses respect for the Creator of the human person."

But as someone who has never experienced the deep sadness and loss that an actual miscarriage brings to the parents of that deceased baby, I really missed the point. Planned Parenthood's latest quip is not only brutally dishonest, but insulting to every miscarried baby and his parents.

One father of a miscarried child wrote, "There were tears, but more so than expected. My wife and I wanted to let our children know just how losing this baby was as hard and painful as if we had lost any of them. It was a terrific opportunity orchestrated by God and our baby in heaven whom we named Gabriel to make an indelible mark on our children's hearts and in their brains that every life, no matter if it only was a barely recognizable 12-week-old baby, was just as precious as any of them are."

To this, his wife added, "Through our acknowledgment of our baby's life and the loss of that life, we touched an unwillingness within some people to admit that the tiny human being I held in my hands, my baby, was a human person. That uncomfortable reality makes it difficult to maintain their unwavering support for the murder of other babies through abortion."

And finally, we hear the stirring words from a mother who has miscarried more than one child:

Anyone who has ever suffered a miscarriage should be outraged at Planned Parenthood's comparison. They are now exploiting the pain and suffering of families to push their agenda of abortion on demand. It's sick!

The problem may be that even many pro-lifers have dismissed miscarriage as just a natural occurrence without honoring the short lives of miscarried babies. We do not walk beside parents in their grief. Many expect moms and dads to just "get over it" and move on with their lives-yet these are the same people fighting for the lives of children who are hours old in the womb, children destined to be killed by abortifacient contraceptives. Can't we see the disconnect?

If we believe that life begins at creation, then we should be mourning the death of every preborn baby who dies-by chance or by choice. Only then, I believe, will the public at large begin to see the value of tiny preborn babies.

The last time we miscarried, someone asked me what I wanted, what I needed. My reply was, "I just want the world to stop-just long enough for me to catch my breath. People would mourn with me if I lost a child outside the womb. Why can't they mourn with me when I've lost a child still in the womb?" The answer is that most people don't know how. As a pro-life movement, we should teach them. Funerals and burials of miscarried children should be the rule, not the exception.

Until we recognize the value and dignity inherent in every human life beginning at creation, we will continue to be two steps behind in this battle for the culture of life.

American Life League embraces the work of Elizabeth Ministry International, an organization dedicated to helping parents of miscarried children. I suggest we all support this ministry and educate ourselves and our families. For too long, Planned Parenthood has abused and twisted language to the detriment of babies and their families. We must speak out and expose this deception. If we do not, who will?

What else can you do?

"The truth will set you free!" (John 8:32).