Dr. John J. Billings
Reprint with permission

I now want to say something especially to the husbands. It is of course, not enough for the husband to say to his wife, "Well, work it out for me and then let me know when it is alright." Pregnancy is a result of a combined effort of both husband and wife; the avoidance of pregnancy also depends on their cooperation. This is a point of worthy consideration. When the husband and wife have the problem of averting pregnancy, we don't say to tbem, "You have a problem which is too difficult for you and we must therefore take it away from you… we must sterilize one or the other of you and find some other method which abolishes the problem." No, the natural method says to the husband and wife, "You have a problem which you can work out together if you help one another and then you provide the information with which you will be able to work out your problem together."

We have noticed so often how it is that the natural method increases the happiness of the husband and wife when it provides them with the capacity to solve a serious problem of family planning in their married life; and, it is not surprising that this should be so.

It is important that the husband know the current state of the cycle. He should see the record and in fact, it should be he who is telling the wife that it is not yet time for intercourse, rather, than that he should be asking and be refused, with the possibility of misunderstanding. There is a message here which goes across very clearly to the wife. When the husband tells her that the time is not yet ripe for intercourse, he is telling her that his love for her body is the product of his love for her and that he is more concerned with her welfare and the security of the family than he is of the gratification of his own physical inclination. A woman understands that message very clearly and she may now develop fresh insight into the depth of her husband's love, while at the same time, the husband is able to experience the greatest joy of all in loving, the joy of giving to the person who is loved.

Fortunately, for the woman, an opportunity to experience the same joy becomes available to her only a few days later when they are completely secure in the days following ovulation. The woman is then able to set aside her fears of pregnancy and by her loving invitations to her husband and her warm cooperation in the act of love, satisfy all his physical and emotional needs. We have found this a common experience and on inquiring into the psychological effect on the use of the natural method and the sense of harmony between husband and wife, we have so very often had the response that they are now happier in their married life than they ever were before; that they understand each other's needs better than before; that they understand the depth of the love of the other person for themselves more than they ever did before and that the physical act of loving is more pleasurable and happier than it has been ever before in their married life.

Mature human loving means self control and by its expression of total generosity, demonstrates the supremacy of the human beings at their noblest level, a supremacy over the chemical urges that alone govern members of the animal kingdom.

(taken from The Ovulation Method, J.J. Billings, M.D.)