Life is a web of relationships. There are many kinds of relationships and there are many forms of friendships. In Jesus, God befriended us. "I have called you friends" (Jn 15:15). God did this intentionally, even when we were underserving of His friendship, "not that we loved God, but that God loved us and sent his Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins. (1 Jn. 4:10)
We have reached the peak of the mountain. We have rested five times between decades of the rosary, each time looking back to appreciate the mosaic of corn and pineapple fields below. We sat down and while eating our sandwiches, talked about friends and classmates in the seminary thirty years ago. There we were, two friends, one a monk for more than twenty years and I a diocesan priest. I only met him once many years ago when he joined the monatery. I visited him again and we went mountain climbing. Our conversation took off as if we have just parted yesterday.
Between friends, time and space do not matter. This was the message of Jesus to His disciples as He prepared them for his eventual passage to the Father, "A little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me because I live and you also will live" (Jn. 14:19). He would be leaving them (next Sunday is Ascension), but He would be present in another manner through the Holy Spirit. He assured them, "I will ask the Father and he will give you another Helper to be with you forever" (Jn.14:16). Friendship overcomes space and time.
This could be another application of Einstein's theory of relativity. When one is with a friend, time passes so fast or time doe not exist at all. Even space is overcome by friendship as the words of the Lord tells us, "I am in my Father, and you in me and I in you" (Jn. 14:20). This may seem a conundrum but think about it well. When a person is your friend, that person resides in your heart and in your mind. So much so, that some people do things, "in the name of my friend, in memory of a friend, in place of a friend, or dedicated to a friend."
Life is a web of relationships. There are many relationships and there are many forms of friendships. There are friendships between children, adolescents, adults, old and young, of the same or of different genders, nationalities, cultures, and colors. There are friends who are fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, brothers and sisters, husbands and wives. Many friends become husbands and wives although there is also the sad fact that some husbands and wives are not friends.
Some friendships begin spontaneously. Two people just click together and discover each other as a "soul friends". Many other friendships were intentional and took time and effort to develop.
Although there are many kinds of friendships, there are common elements that we can identify. For memory's sake, I call these elements AMIGO. In friendship there are the elements of Affection, Mutuality, In-depth communication, Giftedness, and Openness.
Affection may be expressed through verbal or non-verbal ways, or even in comfortable silence. There is mutual sharing and giving betwen friends. Some friends share ideas, money, clothes, and in extreme cases, even a toothbrush. Communication goes beyond the superficial sharing of information to the level of feelings and the gut level. Friendship cannot be forced. It is ultimately given as a gift, although time and effort may have been spent to deserve it. Friends open to each other their inmost secrets.
If these elements describe human friendships, then these may also be used to describe our frienship with God. In Jesus, God befriended us. "I have called you friends" (Jn 15:15). God did this intentionally, even when we were underserving of His friendship, "not that we loved God, but that God loved us and sent his Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins. (1 Jn. 4:10) God showed his affection for us by touching us through the Incarnate Word. So deep is God's love for us that He maintains this friendship by His Gift of the Holy Spirit, "the Father will give you another Helper who will be with you forever" (Jn. 14:16).
Since friendship is mutual what can we do from our side? What gift can one give to Somebody who literally has everything? We take our cue from St. Therese of the Child Jesus and Blessed Teresa of Calcutta, "to do little things with great love." A visit to the Blesssed Sacrament, a whispered prayer, an act of kindness, lighting a candle, sitting by the side of the sick, standing for the truth -- all these are pleasing to the Lord. According to the great Doctor of the spritual Life, St. Teresa of Avila, love for God is measured not by the intensity or depth of our feelings, but by following His commandments."If you love me, you will keep my commandments" (Jn. 14:15).
Friendship too has its demands. A friend has to be trustworthy, keep confidences, and care for the well-being and happiness of his friend. We are God's friends forever, and we try to please him always.